I Need An Easy Friend

I’m looking for large-scale, LIFE COACH LANGUAGE.

A ONE-STOP SHOP miracle drug that will CLEAN ME,

stretch MY SPINE, fix my POSTURE, make me EAT BETTER,

and stop SMOKING.

See, the ADVANTAGE to listlessness is the ABILITY

to see the horizon in ALL DIRECTIONS. EVERYTHING

tastes sweet. I can watch ANYTHING on television. No

porn is TOO WEIRD for me.

I DO like apples better than pears. I mean I PREFER

them. I DO go to bed with a fan on each night. But

I’m SKEPTICAL about my CAPACITY for PATH-MAKING.

HERE’S SOMETHING ABOUT A LAUNDRY BAG:

I fill it up with DIRTY clothes until the pile’s TOO MUCH

on the eyes. See, a proclivity for being TOO HARD on myself

leads to SUDDEN OUTBURSTS of being too soft.

IT’S BEEN HARD, all this brain talk. Let me lie in bed ALL

DAY. I understand the benefits of HABITS but how does

ANYONE floss regularly.

I’m weaving between KNIFE BRIGHT/WHIP-HANDED and

sodden—not unlike a french fry. Too much SORRY talk, not

enough TIME spent chewing at the window.

See, we’re more RESILIENT than we think, to take on all

this self and social BATTERING—to keep ourselves from

eating ONLY BUTTER.

Nellie Papsdorf is a part-time poet from Portland, OR. You can follow her online at @worldsbiggestballofyarn.